A couple weeks ago I decided to delve into the whole potty training thing again with Beans. We've been trying for awhile, but I decided to really dedicate myself to the endeavor, and try a new technique.
It didn't go well.
All the usual familiar thoughts started going through my head. I worried that I had not tried hard enough, or that others would think that I hadn't. All those sorts of anxiety laced imaginings that catch up to me while I am laying in bed trying to sleep.
But, then I remembered that I am trying to be a better mom by being kind to myself. The happier I am with my decisions the happier of a mom I can be. If I am always looking to others to define my worth I can never be sure of how I feel, or who I am. I'll forever trying to reach an imaginary, unattainable standard. I stood up to those negative thoughts.
I began to ask myself some tough questions about whether I really thought that I did give it a good effort, and if my instinct was that he wasn't ready. I felt that my answers were genuine. Giving up the potty training for now is what is best for him. There has been so many other times where I listened to other people's ideas on what was best for my kids, and in the instance of developmental types of things I was rarely wrong. My instincts (much like most parent's) were almost always correct. There have been times where I deeply regret not listening to my instincts, and letting other's dictate the situation. Some of those times have greatly added to my children's anxiety, because I know the situation was too overwhelming for them at that time, or just the wrong fit.
I did begin to reassure myself about all the cool new leaps he's made lately. In the last year Beans has been able to do so many new things. His developmental progress is nothing to be upset about.
Let's have a look at all new skills Beans has acquired recently.